Zoo Recap

Well, kids, we nearly pissed it away (similar to my picture on another blog).  But in the end, we prevailed over the Zoo on a refurbished Dairy 2 by a final score of 14-9 I think.  Again, don’t have the book in front of me since Tim takes it home every week to give himself a scorebook enema (also known as the Widowmaker).  
  
We scored 9 runs in the 1^st.  My gimpy back removed me from the lineup after once through so that “Too Drunk to Stand” Dermowitz would stop pouting and start swinging and missing.  9 runs in the first, lots of hard hit singles that nearly killed their pitcher and certainly would have destroyed a Fleisher pitcher (too soon?).  But everyone was fine.  TJ Cousins made his Refugee debut in vintage Franklin form….couple of nice hits followed by a couple of terrible throws.  In his defense, I’m not sure there was a throw that Derm could have caught yesterday but I’m positive that those weren’t them.  Those weren’t they?  Them wasn’t these?  Jesus!  Just Flynn’d up my grammar here.   
Moving on, Memorial Nick went 2-3 or something to remain in 2^nd place on the Refugee batting as I hit a sac fly to remain where I am….at the top.  Normally this sort of self promotion would not be included in this blog, but since it annoys Nick that he’s second I’ll allow it. 

Danielle and rookie Tap Room Traitor Casey (Traitcy) played well, although I think Traitcy went 0-3 and would like to use her Refugee mulligan for the game.  Too bad.  Take some laps and don’t’ worry about it too much.  We’re not the Tap Room.  You won’t be cut or told to spend the night in the Ogre’s van.  Unless you want to.  In which case, let us know so we can get another girl for next Tuesday.   

Verne fell in love with Matty and it was cute to see.  Hanging on his every word, getting that twinkle in his eye when matty smiled at him.  It’s the way Vellia used to feel about anyone who talked to him.  It’s the Pam’s dog used to feel about running in circles.  The way buddy’s hair felt before it starting falling into the sink when he was 9.  The way Phyllis’s boobs crackle in the South Jersey beach sun.  The way Nevins gets ¾ just thinking about the last sentence.  Yeah.  Verne had that feeling last night.

Also Buddy’s dad has shown up to more of our games this year than C Marino.  Nice to have fans.  Where’s Ali again?

Around the league, Frank likes Die Hard, Ray broke Nikki’s hand on a liner back up the middle.  Bad Ray!  Rice is a dingleberry, and Pickle gets very bored.  Now you’re caught up.  2 games this week and my over/unders were off by a combined 3 runs.  Damn I’m good.  Lines could have been better but I’m pulling this sideways out of my cornhole so bear with me.

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Ralph Kiner’s Game Notes

·       I didn’t have a hit breaking the streak of games since the last time I didn’t have a hit

·       Casey’s pressing too much after an 0-3 start

·       TJ Cousins has made a cardboard cutout of Derm to throw softballs at

·       Gonzo still hasn’t learned to charge the ball

·       Pete can’t “turn it off”

·       Tim swallows

·       The Blogfather, La Nice, Flynn, Buddy's Dad, and the Darkness gave us a nice little audience

·       Lynches are the best mid-game meal

·       Roxy drank a Lynch

·       Buddy’s dad loves us more than his son who he say he “would kill.”  Direct quote.

·       My intestines have not forgiven me for Taco Bell Sunday.  Yo Quiero colonic!

·       We wish Nikki a quick recovery.  Better start thawing Tina now for Tuesday

·       Adam takes the most obvious “get me out swing”

·       Matty Matty Matty

·       C Marino showed up/still awful to talk to

·       Derm has sobered up………………..now. 

·       Mickles texts me more now that he’s on another team

·       Ed was pissed he wasn’t in the 2 hole

·       Paul made a sleeveless diving catch with a hair flip and a GQ pose….or was it Parade Magazine…maybe it was for Out

·       Skinner had the flu which means lost big at the track

·       Andrea misses me

·       Whiskey Frank takes WAY too long to put up his posts

Quotes from the Week

“Dammit Ray!”

“Pow!  Haha, Pow.”

Phylly’s Boobs

“Hello Blogfather.”

“Hello Blogson.”

“Seriously, I don’t care about my batting average.”

Nick, lying

“I farted.”

Derm

"My tolerance for people is very high."

El Colach

“Crunch, crunch, crunch…..good spine.”

La Nice

“We didn’t have a game this week so I don’t need to pay attention to anyone else’s team.”

Nevins

“So, then, I just dropped her back off at her dorm and went to work.”

Nick

“Nick…seriously…I can pitch….i’m drunk that not much.”

Derm

"Give me yours, I can't get mine up!"

El Colach

“Get him the F____ out of there!”

Oberlin about Derm

"Mr Muhler!!!!"
Memorial Nick

"Fucker didn't tell me we there rained out.  I"m going to murder Buddy."
Buddy's Dad

"You can use my shovel and my bags of lye."
Kyle Jacobs

“At least we didn’t get Rayned out.”

Edventures

“Yo, I didn’t like the spotlight, haha.  It was wildly inaccurate, haha!”

Lynch

“Philadelphia has a Zoo?”

Gonzo

“I bought a jersey, didn’t pay for it, and don’t live in this state.”

Pell

“Where’s my ‘Will Drop Pants for Booze’ sign?  I can’t go to the street without it.”

Derm

"27 hours Mickey."

Blogson

“I miss the Pickle’s Historical Reference of the Week.”
 

Benedict Pickle

“Your blog sucks.  Frank’s blog has video…..and a ferris wheel.”

Darkness

“I gotta get more segments for this thing.”

Me

"That's a quadrangle of awesomeness."

El Colach

"I can't either have sex with you or you can watch me go to the lake to drink."

The Camel

“I don’t like my nickname.”

Traitsey

"I don't get quoted anymore."

Benson

"You all know me.  How do I NOT put this  picture on the blog?